Niki DeMar has just released her newest single Messy Room, and we did not want to miss the opportunity to have a conversation with her to talk about, her music, fashion, mental health, and upcoming projects.
Most of us knew Niki DeMar due to the success of the media content she has been sharing with us alongside her twin sister Gabi, and later on, by herself. We love her spontaneity, her fashion tips, and we absolutely love how honest she has been when talking about how she deals with the highs and lows of this life.
Keep reading to know a more intimate Nikki DeMar and discover her new music, which must be said, came out at the right moment. I am pretty sure you will love Messy Room as much as I do.
Q: What do fashion and trends mean to you? How would you describe the importance of them in your life and career?
Fashion has always been something that releases serotonin in my brain. I have to do a lot of things I don’t like to do for my job, but whenever I’m styling outfits, browsing on Pinterest, watching fashion content, making fashion content, thrifting, working on my depop store (sadtaurusshop), or finding new small businesses to shop from, I feel alignment in my body. Growing up, my mom used to buy these blank books to make our own stories and color, and while my sisters did so, I would design outfits in those little books. My love for fashion is what eventually led me to gain a following on YouTube and having an interest in making fashion content with my twin sister. Without my love for fashion, I for sure wouldn’t be here.
Q: Why do you think people love Niki and Gabi? What new thing do you have for us?
I think people love to see 2 sisters who are completely different, share the same sense of humor, and have fun together. I also think our fights, clashing, and public issues make us relatable to anyone who has a sibling or sister. You love them as hard as you hate them, but no one else can hate them, only you. Sisters will unfollow each other when they’re mad, but if anyone else unfollows them, that’s not okay. It’s the most fun and confusing relationship I have and I think it interests people. Our content has evolved from how-to, lifestyle, fashion, beauty, to our relationship as sisters which is universal. We have a lot to say when we come back and want to share our personalities and life even more. I can’t wait.
Q: In spite of being well-known for your fashion videos, you have also taken the time to use your platforms to talk about things that concern you the most, mental health included. What do you do to deal with all the crazy things that are going on around the world?
We all are on a journey of healing from whatever trauma or heartbreak we’ve endured in the past, and we have to navigate that while dealing with present things that are going on in the world simultaneously- it can be A LOT. I’ve learned through quarantine a skill called “compartmentalizing” which has helped me to deal with everything at once. For example, if something is triggering my anxiety in my personal life, all while I’m being attacked online, and I’m at a friend’s house while this is all happening (this situation has happened multiple times), I learn to control where my thoughts go, or else I will have a downward spiral or anxiety attack. I’ll tell myself “not today, not right now, deal with later” and just focus on the present moment, the people around me, or a conversation I’m having, because we really do have all the time in the world to deal with our issues.
Q: You have been trying to stay closer to your fans and followers by being open about your life, relationships, preferences, and personal interests; therefore, what do think about the importance of being honest and speaking out?
The entire first 3 years of my career I was SO impersonal and only devoted my days to editing, putting up an image, and crippling inside in my personal life which led to acne, extreme weight loss, and depression. You’re not supposed to suppress. For me, as a public figure, I need to let everyone in or I don’t want this job. Putting up an image that isn’t you, and not being authentic while dealing with crazy things in your personal life, is a setup for disaster. It’s like, go all the way or not at all. The “in-between” of being a public figure but not being yourself will lead you down a dark hole because you start to feel shameful of who you really are, and you think if your fans saw who you really were, they wouldn’t idolize you anymore. In 2018, it was kind of a decision I made and stuck with and I’m glad I did.
Q: Now, let us talk about your music, how did you decide it was time to express yourself that way?
I’ve always wanted to release music independently from my sister because I knew how different we were. We were so used to compromising on everything and meeting in the middle, which made sense from a business standpoint, but as far as my art goes, I can’t compromise on that. I have to tell MY story. I also love finding new undiscovered artists. It’s genuinely my hobby, and I’m obsessed with Spotify. I also have a lot of healing I’m navigating from my childhood, growing into adulthood, while navigating my personal relationships and my career, which is a LOT on my mental health, so writing is just so natural for me. It’s how I cope, which is why all of my songs seem healing or have sad undertones. Making music is just how I deal with life.
Although I always wanted to do this; I, unfortunately, didn’t believe in myself enough on my own, because the Niki and Gabi brand had gotten so big, so much rave and so much attention. I felt so proud of what I’d created with my sister, but literally horrible about myself on my own. I got to a point where I thought I would just have to be a “twin” the rest of my life and release music as Niki from Niki and Gabi, clothing from the Niki and Gabi brand, and so on. I thought it was too late.
Then, quarantine happened. I reflected so hard and realized I would hate myself for life if I never went for my dreams and just did the damn thing. So, I did it. This has been one of the best years of my life, personally. I’ve never felt more myself.
Q: We know new music is coming out, what can you tell us about “Messy Room”?
Messy Room was written when I got fed up on how to explain myself and my lifestyle constantly to people in my personal life. People would either make jokes about my messy room/apartment, be passive-aggressive, bring it up at family dinners, holidays, etc. So, I just stopped inviting people over and wrote this song. My messy room (and apartment) is due to my depression, and it’s something I’ve been ashamed of, but I’m not perfect, so something’s gotta give. I put all my energy into my career while being high-functioning depressed, I’m not going to have enough energy left to clean up. Like I say in the song “these bad habits are cuz of my mind, something’s gotta give so I can unwind.”
The other meaning of the song is that my room is my safe place where I avoid everything I don’t feel like facing or dealing with, but that same room is the reason I miss out on so much, or I’m not actually where I want to be in life. My room holds me back just as much as it comforts me. When someone is depressed, that room is their rock, and they need that isolation in there.
Q: What other goals do you have for the future?
I have goals of releasing an album, touring, getting signed to my first label, and having my own clothing line.
Q: What would you like to say to those teenagers who want to start a career in fashion or other media-related activities?
I say go for it. Don’t be scared of failure to the point where you don’t go for it, because I did the same with music. I’m mad I waited so long, and wish I could’ve just gone for it as soon as I knew I wanted to do this. It’s SO worth it.
Q: Anything else you would like to share with Vanity Teen?
My favorite quotes that help me:
“It’s a bad day, not a bad life”
“You don’t need an answer right now”
“Enjoy the climb while you head towards the destination”
“The universe has a weird way of working itself out”.
Before we go
As you can see, this year Niki DeMar has chosen to open up her heart and be honest to all of us as a form of beauty and strength, and we thank her for that. Her new song Messy Room is a beautiful mid-tempo ballad that invites us to join her in this healing journey while letting us know we all face difficult issues that we have to deal with; and, in that way; she is also letting us know we are not alone.
Let us remember her words and never stop working hard to achieve the things you love; so stay tuned with her new projects, and just like her, never forget to find the peace you deserve even if it is in a messy room.